Too fast into the future

It's 2.11am, I'm watching As Told By Ginger, and I realized how much I miss being a child. I used to watch the show all the time and I never miss it. So it seems like my childhood days are over. I'm a teenager with school work, O' levels around the corner, hormones that make your emotions go wild and having responsibilities way over what I expected. I'm tired, of everything I have to go through with. But there are good times too. The worst is that, at the end of this year, I'm leaving IJ. That's the worst.

Ticking bomb

I have no time left to have fun. Homework is on my nerves and it's making me panic as time passes by. It's like a ticking bomb waiting to explode. What I fear most is having amaths tomorrow. Somehow, I have a strong feeling I'm going to get yelled at. Plus, I found out I have to do 4 amaths school papers, not two. Kill me, just do it.

And you're the only one who can save me

I had a choice in this relationship, the easy way or the hard way. I didn't know choosing the easy way would hurt so badly. You have no idea how much it hurts me to make this decision. I know I've hurt you so much that you could hate me. I hurt you so much, you could have walked away from me. But you stayed with me. But in doing this, you are hurting yourself, and if i could, I would take it back and be happy with you again. Being by your side, keeping you safe and always protecting you. I would have never hurt you. You never fail to make me happy, always putting me first. Now the thought of losing you just kills me. Crying ever night, without fail. How much this situation hurts me right now. I miss you every second, without fail. I think of you everyday, without fail. Sometimes I would forget we do not belong to each other anymore, and thought, I will get to see my baby and know that my day would already be worth living. If you have to let me go, do it. I won't make you go through this any longer. If it was a different time, we would be perfect. Time is not on my side. I love you, I never stop loving you.